Sentimental

Being so fed up.

Yes. I dunno what hormones affecting me since I woke up from my peaceful nap, this afternoon.

No, it wasn’t peaceful no more since I got this bad feeling.

My other-self (who speaks real honest than myself) in my head, blame me for I took “the decision” about 7 months ago. Creeps me, haunted me soon after that day. A very huge mistake ever done in my life. I shouldn’t take it. It remains as a regret.

Karena sudah terlanjur juga ya ada baiknya sekarang saya sedikit-sedikit berusaha untuk mengabaikan perasaan ini. Toh, ya tinggal kurang-lebih 6-7 bulan lagi kelar. Well, teman-teman terdekat saya pasti ngerti banget sekarang saya ngomongin apa.

Saya sampe belum tidur jam segini karena saya mikirin hal ini. Kalau gak ditulis, rasanya berat banget di dada. Nyesek banget. I don’t care if you consider this as some kind of whining. I do whine. This is whining. So, yes, ini memang keluhan saya.

Saya berusaha menyembunyikan perasaan ini, sejak lama. Saya berusaha bertahan. Sampai sekarang. Setiap ada yang menyelipkan nama itu, perasaan saya yang tadinya datar-datar aja, atau lagi seneng, bisa tiba-tiba langsung drop. Males dengernya. Tiap ada yang bilang “Ciee.. jadi ini gitu sekarang. Udah naik dong ya. Keren banget”, rasanya itu orang pengen saya tampar bolak-balik, saya lipet jadi origami, saya injek-injek. Seriusan. Tapi itu di hati saya yang terdalam. Karena saya biasanya cuman bisa senyum asem terus ketawa dan bilang “Dih. Maksudnya apa? Aneh.”

Di sana saya mempunyai teman-teman yang baik. Tadinya mereka sama sekali belum bisa disiplin, tetapi sekarang saya sudah melihat kesungguhan mereka untuk mencoba berusaha mendisiplinkan diri dan teman lainnya. Yang saya gak tahan mungkin ada yang attitudenya gak cocok sama saya dan bodohnya saya juga gak bisa mengkomunikasikan hal itu. Selera bercandanya juga termasuk aneh dan cenderung filthy. Saya gak suka. Okay, nobody’s perfect. Saya gak bisa cocok sama semua orang, toh ada juga orang yang gak cocok sama saya. Fair enough.

Kembali lagi karena keterlanjuran itu, saya berusaha untuk mencoba mengikhlaskan diri di jalan yang sekarang tempuh untuk mencapai apa yang dulu saya impikan seperti idola saya yang anak HI UI itu haha :p I take this mistake as a lesson for me to get wiser than before. To be honest, being a catalyst, being a leader,  bukan jalan saya mungkin. Karena saya ternyata punya mimpi yang lain, yang membuat saya hidup, yang membuat mata saya berbinar tiap saya mendengarnya. Semuanya terasa benar ada di kepala saya, di hati saya. Saya rasa, itulah yang membuat saya semangat menjalani hari saya.

I really want to take up cookery lessons, gastronomy stuffs. Mungkin nanti saya akan sekolah lagi setelah kuliah, atau bekerja dulu untuk bersekolah lagi.

Saya ingin menikmati festival music di Indonesia, Asia, lalu dunia. Dear, talented yet underrated musicians, wait for me!

Saya juga ingin sekali menghadiri konser musisi favorit saya, dari konser yang besar, sampe intimate concert mereka.

Saya ingin keliling dunia dan nyobain setiap street food sampe makanan kebangsaannya. Entah backpacking atau gimana, tetep saya mau jalanin.

Saya ingin bikin bistro. Sophisticated bistro. Entah di mana. Ini mimpi saya.

Saya pengen meluk Armando Reed, Oli Pettigrew, Henry Golding, and Jason Godfrey. *cheesy wishes haha*

Dan ada mimpi-mimpi lain yang jadi my little treasures for myself dan ada juga yang mungkin bisa muncul begitu aja di pikiran saya, entah sekilas, atau menghantui saya hahaha :p

Earlier this afternoon,at 3.40 p.m, sunrays hit my left face after the rain. Somehow, the warmth of the rays stroke my chest. In a good way. It touched me in its own way. I still can feel it now. Feeling so sentimental I almost cry all of sudden. I assume that was a message brought by the universe.”This is your life, don’t worry about things. You are tough and can get through all of this with your head held up high. Do the best of the bestest.”

When I Get Excited (yet cheesy)

It’s been a long time I don’t write anything here hehe. I'm so busy. (or pretend to be busy?)

But, seriously, I'm always in the middle of deadlines and meetings and so-called me times. During me-time, I always avoid computers. Always. Because it reminds me of assignments. Damn you.

In fact, while I'm trying to write this, I also do my Consumer Behavior assignment.

Anywaaay, I'm here now to tell you a great story of mine happened 4 days ago. I'm still excited about the moment and trying not to smile ear to ear, like for no reason haha :D

I just got one thing in my bucket list done.

For free.

Sounds like a miracle, eh? I believe God hears me and also the universe tried to make it happen because I always have this imagination in my mind. Daydreaming is okay, guys :p

I was working on my Int'l Marketing Management Assignment in campus library with my friends. See? Assignments? Never be able to get rid of that. They're always follow me whereever I go. Since I'm a student haha

It was Tuesday and I guess I had enough of my routines. Until I read someone's twit on my twitter timeline said that he's on Asia tour from Japan, Korea, and by the time he tweeted that he was in Manila, and after done the gig there, then it's off to Indonesia.

Wait. Indonesia?

My heart stopped beating. Okay this is sounds cheesy. But yeah, I did feel the shock. Hahaha

Then, I click on his twitter account. He retweeted a twit from one famous radio station in Jogjakarta.

I got curiouser. Gue kan tinggal di Jogja. Gimana gak ketar-ketir coba?

@swaragamafm: Kamu bisa liat live performance dari @wherewascharlie & @liyanafizi di launching Flashy Distro tanggal 17-11-12 di Jalan Cendrawasih No 8 YK

Nah. Saat gue baca twit itu adalah saat-saat dimana gue merasakan kalo detak jantung gue went like rollercoaster. Fast and like, uncontrollable. Sorry for this dramatic moment. But, yes, I felt that.

I screamed in silent with my mouth open and my face went so cheerful all of sudden. My friends were confused and curious, they laughed at me hahaha. So I told them what I just saw. They didn't understand who I was talking about. So I texted my friend to accompany me to the gig at November 17th. She said, okay. What a great friend I have hehe. Thank God :) Semoga dia gak cengangas-cengenges baca blog gue ini. Gue sms dia soalnya kenapa, karena di Jogja gue ngerasa cuman dia aja (selain temen gue satu lagi di ISI, entah jarang ketemu huhu) yang gue kenal yang selera musiknya sebelas-dua belas sama gue a.k.a gak jauh beda hahaha X))

Rencana udah mantep banget nih.
Eh ternyata, temen gue satu lagi yang kuliah di Maranatha Bandung lagi pulang ke Jogja, ngajakin main. Nah, sekalian aja gue ajak ke acara yang sama. Kebetulan, doi juga nyerempet-nyerempet lah selera musiknya hehe secara kita kalo nonton Maliq & D'essentials, Barry Likumahuwa Project, RAN, Soulvibe, dan acara musik seru lain yang layak ditonton pasti bareng kita berdua, kadang kita bertiga sambangi. I love you lah Mak :p
Makin mantep.

D-day.
Jeng-jeng. I decided to wear my white long sleeve tee. Why? Itu baju kebangsaan gue setiap nonton konser, acara musik (choir, piano recital, etc). Secara setiap gue pake baju itu, selalu ada aja kejadian yang memorable hehe. Entah itu karena gue yang pecicilan atau memang baju itu ditakdirkan untuk menjadi saksi bisu my memorable moments. *ciye ah*

Acaranya sih jam 7 tapi kita selalu inget satu pedoman hidup di Indonesia, apalagi di Jogja, sodara-sodara: Jam 7 artinya adalah jam 7 lewat. Jam 7 lewat 15 menit, lewat 30 menit, lewat 45 menit. Pokoknya jam 7 lewat. Artinya gak on-time.
Yaudah deh, gue dijemput Diana dan makan sore dulu di mall deket rumah. Asli deket rumah. 5 menit nyampe, jeung. Rumpi layaknya gadis-gadis seperti biasanya. Boong banget kalo cewek ketemu cewek gak rumpi. Betul? ;p
Jam 6.40 jemput Yoka kerumahnya dan jalan ramai lancar dengan sedikit macet dong sodara-sodara.

Jeng-jeng. Jam 7. 20
Sampe di depan parkiran distro, kita gak nemu stage secuil. Eh, ada mbak-mbak yang nyamperin kita.

Mbak (lupa nanya namanya): "Lagi ada launch distro Flashy baru loh. Masuk aja yuk. Ada free drinks and snacks juga. Ini nih ada penyanyi dai Malaysia sama Singapore juga."
Gue: "Ooh.. Ada Charlie Lim kan ya?"
Mbak: "Ada kok. Tuh lagi perform.."
*anjrit kita telat*
Gue: "Ah makasih ya mbak!" *ngeloyor masuk ke distro*

Temen gue ngintilin dari belakang. Haduh, maafkan saya yang norak ini ya teman-teman :'(
Sampe di dalem, gue mblusak-mblusuk kerumunan orang (gak tahu padanan kata dalam Bahasa Indonesia. Nyelip-nyelip, mungkin ya?), Charlie was singing There Is No Love. And the only thing I did was gasping, my hands were shaking so hard that I couldn't take any pictures of him so I asked Yoka to capture some photos of him singing.

*speechless*

Honestly, if you can read my mind, you can feel the excitement. It's quite hard to write down the moment. It's like dream comes true. No, it is indeed dream comes true.

After sang the song he said "Terima kasih. :)" Hahaha how cute!

courtesy: flashy shop

Clarity

He thanked to the guy who guide him to the trip in Jogja (if I'm not wrong) and after that he asked the audience to sing one of John Mayer famous song that Charlie once covered with Adam Katz, Clarity.

I sang along to the song and felt my feet groove to the beat. Bliss.

As the song ended and he went on the backstage, I took a glance at my friends and they gave me a code to catch up Charlie.

"Liyana Fizi's now on stage and I still don't know how to catch up with him.
The urge to talk to him is so huge." This kept me me insane as my friends encourage me to do so.

We bought his EP and merchandise (totebag and T-shirt) and as soon as possible we left the venue and found Mbak-yang-gue-lupa-tanya-namanya (anyway, Makasih banyak, Mbak :)), she said that Charlie is nice and friendly, "Go talk to him, he is very nice." Gue tanya, tadi Charlie main berapa lagu? Katanya tiga lagu. Oke. Berarti gue ketinggalan 1 1/2 lagu. I assumed lagu pertama itu Pedestal.
Since, my friends and I don't know where Charlie was, Mbak ini nunjukkin kita connecting roomnya stage tadi, ternyata eh ternyata distro sebelah dong, bok.

Langsung lah, kita melesat ke situ. Gue dengan jantung yang beating faster like rollercoaster, asked mas-mas distro untuk minjemin spidolnya untuk-gak lain dan gak bukan-minta Charlie tandatanganin EP & totebag kita. I really did the relaxing breathe session with my hands up and down due to breathe-in breathe-out HAHAHAHAHA I WAS SO CHEESY! *oke, ini mulai gak nyante*

He was sitting alone. And I didn't know what he thought about. Doi bengong, bok. Kasian, dianggurin, gak ada yang ngajakin ngobrol, gitu? Heran. Itu pikiran gue saat itu. Sekarang juga sih. Hehe.

Gue: Charlie?
Charlie: *nengok, kayaknya doi kaget* Oh. Hi!
Gue: May I get your autograph on your EP and bag?
Charlie: Oh, it's okay. No problem. *He smiles, and please someone call 911!*
Gue: *nyodorin EP & totebags* I'm so glad that you're finally have gig here.
Charlie: Oh thank you so much. Thank you so much. *sambil tanda tangan EP & totebags. Doi bingung mau tanda tangan EP sebelah mana since yang gue sodorin itu ada tulisannya dan dia gak mau coret credit thanks itu. Akhirnya dia tanda tangan di pojok kanan atas credit thanks page*

It turned out, spidolnya bocor dan bikin kotor tangannya. Gue jadi gak enak. But, he was fine with it.

Gue: I've been waiting for 8 months to see your live performance here since I watched you on Channel News Asia AM Live! And Iwent straight to googling you and found your bandcamp, myspace, soundcloud, and youtube. You're awesome.
Charlie: Are you from Sing.. Oh, right you watched it here. Wow. Thank you so much.
Gue: Thank God, I can see your performance tonight. I hope your next album launch in Indonesia too so I can get your album because it's so hard to find your physical album here.
Charlie: Oh, is it? Thank you so much for your support. Thank you.
Gue: Thank you Charlie, for the time.Bye!
Charlie: Okay guys, thank you.

He looked pale and tired, but he still did our requests. He's nice.

Gue pernah sekali posting disini bahwa ada satu musisi yang bikin gue jatuh cinta dengan karyanya. Lagunya asik banget, suaranya apalagi. Jazzy yet husky voice. He's playing on neo-soul, funk, folkrock, jazz, R&B genre.
It's been a memorable moment ever. Eight months is quite fast to wait for something I've been craving for.

Priceless.

Thank you Charlie for introduce me to awesome music you've created.

Wishlist (Yang Kepikiran) Sebulan Terakhir

Lama juga ya saya gak menyambangi blog ini.
Sebenernya udah banyak banget yang pengen saya ceritain di sini. Eh sekarang malah lupa mau nulis apaan.
Mungkin karena terlalu banyak ide di kepala saya yang keluarnya pas lagi mau tidur, lagi di jalan (By the way, gw ngendarain motor. Mau ditulis dimane? Pas udah nyampe tujuan, lupa deh tuh.)

Jadi gw bakal ngisi seadanya dulu deh ini hehe :D

Wishlist saya yang kepikiran satu bulan terakhir ini adalaaahh:

1. Ngisi blog teratur. Harusnya ya, since I'm an introvert dan terlalu banyak ide di kepala saya. 
2. I have to have my own self-portraits, minimal 5-10 tahun sekali deh ya. Maunya sih saya pajang di kamar sendiri. Jadinya saya, - eh, ini gw kaku gak sih make saya?- oke ulang, jadinya gue bisa inget apa aja perbedaan yang ada sama gue selama 5-10 tahun terakhir baik dari fisik maupun dari pengalaman-pengalaman yang udah gue jalanin selama itu dan gimana gue berusaha untuk melihat ke masa depan, try to capture my future image. Introspeksi, intinya.
3. Ikutan Shave For Hope. Cut my hair or even shave all my hair off. For my "brothers and sisters" out there who suffer cancer and lost their hair because of the medical treatment, such as kemo. I love em :)
4. Post my photos before and after I have my hair cut/shaved. I want you guys to care for them too :)

I really wish these missions could be done in a year.

What Should I Call This Feeling?

Gue telah (dan masih) terperosok ke dalam cinta yang paling dalam. *jedaaarrr*
Well, jatuh cinta itu gak sebatas jatuh cinta sama lawan jenis doang. Lebih dari itu.
Hal paling kecil yang bikin gw bisa jatuh cinta itu bisa dibilang musik, makanan, buku.


Gue sering jatuh cinta dgn musik yg pertama kali gue denger, apalagi yang kebetulan gak mainstream.

Gue sering jatuh cinta dengan rasa makanan yang pertama kali gue rasain. Dulu gw pernah nyobain masakan yang sama tapi rasanya berbeda.

Gue sering jatuh cinta dengan cerita di novel atau komik, yah, let's say menye gitu dan bahkan yang kocak. Jatuh cinta dengan sebuah buku yang memancing minat gue, lebih dari sekedar novel.

Tepatnya 5 hari yang lalu, gue siap-siap mo ke kampus, sarapan depan TV. Entah kenapa, sodara-sodara, otak gue mengarahkan tangan gue untuk mencet channel 330. Channel News Asia. So, I watched AM! Live.

There was an oriental-looking boy was interviewed by the newscasters. He was wearing glasses, cross-stripped shirt and red cardigan.

Nerd-looking style. This. I. Like

Hal pertama itu yang menarik minat gue hehe :p  Pas gue liat ada gitar disenderin (kalo gak salah) di kursi  cowok ini, maka makin antusias lah gue buat nerusin nonton. gue dengerinlah percakapan mereka. Ternyata cowok ini adalah singer-songwriter from Melbourne dan udah merilis EP tahun lalu di Australia dan Singapura.

Selesai diwawancara, cowok ini didaulat untuk nyanyiin lagunya sendiri. Ya iya lah  ya ngapain juga bawa-bawa gitar ke studio kalo bukan buat dipetik *ciee ah dipetik*

Daaaann, dia nyanyiin lagunya diiringi petikan gitarnya yang calming menurut gue. Iyeh menurut gue. Lah kan belom semuanya pada dengerin ye hehe

Since then, I've fallen in love. Well, exactly not with the person, but his voice and his songs.

Secara gue emang suka banget sama suara & lagunya, lalu gue search namanya di myspace dengan senang hati :3

Gue dengerin semua lagunya yang mana cuman empat biji. Secara EP kan yang dia rilis, bukan full album.
Gue cari juga twitternya, follow, mention, nanya dimana gue bisa dapet EP nya, soalnya gak ada link free download kayak Nathan Hartono gitu yang literally emang nyaranin download lewat situ. Bukan ngebajak ya.

Dibales! Dan katanya Album dalam bentuk hard copy belum ada, dan dia nyaranin gue download his EP in his bandcamp site. AUD$ 10 for all songs in his EP.
Agak sayang duit segitu buat download EP nya. Kenapa gw bilang 'agak'? Soalnya lagunya worth much buat didengerin, disimpen. Sayang karena gue gak punya kartu kredit dan belum punya penghasilan sendiri.

Y u no cheap a bit haa?

Jadi, gue sekarang lagi rajin dengerin lagu via myspace doi hahaha :D sembari menunggu di ngerilis album dalam bentuk hard copy dan memungkinkan bisa gw pesen atau bahkan, gw beli di Indonesia kalo dirilis di sini juga :)
Dengan senang hati gue bakal beli deh :))

Oh! I almost forgot to tell you his name. His name is Charlie Lim.

Aloha! :D

I'm a newbie here.

So, this is my second blog I've ever made. On purpose.
The first one, entah bagaimana itu kehapus. Untung isinya juga bisa dibilang gak jelas haha :))

 All of my thoughts, that I will post here. Need to express what's in my mind without being cheesy. I'm trying :)